Friday Night Dinner

“It takes years of training to eat like we do.”—Lorelai Gilmore

She’s not wrong. It’s no small feat to consume calories like a Gilmore, but we are definitely going to try, because next week, we’ve got 6 hours of new Gilmore Girls to binge watch and there’s only one way to do it.

We’ve got Luke’s Burger, Danishes, Mucho Mac and Cheese, and Miss Patty’s Founders Punch to wash it all down, and we’re going to put them all together into the ultimate Friday Night Dinner, a feast worthy of our girls and one Emily would never allow to be served at her house.

But. 

Come on.

We are honoring Lorelai and Rory, those great eaters, medical marvels of genetic defense against obesity and Type II diabetes! 

You didn’t think we were going to stop with burgers, pastry, pasta, and punch, did you?

No, of course not. For this to be a true Gilmore feast, we’ve got to accessorize the meal with the other essentials: 

Fries!

Red Vines!

Pop Tarts!

Marshmallows!

Cookie Dough!

Whipped Cream, straight outta the can!

I stopped there, because for us mere mortals, this is all probably enough, though if you feel up to the challenge, feel free to add more junk food and maybe the coffee you will need to restart your heart. 

Are you ready? Don’t be afraid. We can do this, as long as we skip the rolls, right?

You’re so ready. We eat at 7, don’t be late.

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Friday Night Dinner

Put this all together with your favorite junk food, and you've got a feast to rival even the Bracebridge Dinner.

Luke's Burger & Fries (don't forget the salt & pepper dip!)

Cherry Cheese Danishes

Mucho Mac & Cheese

Miss Patty's Founders Punch

Miss Patty's Founders Punch

Now that we've filled up on burgers, danish, and mac and cheese, we might just be ready for some of Miss Patty's punch! After all, according to Lorelai Gilmore, it's best drunk after consuming a loaf of bread, a pound of crackers, and a quart of olive oil. I think we've probably had the equivalent of that by now. 

The Founders Punch of Stars Hollow was known to be used to remove tar from construction sites, the tar from scorned women's souls, and was also pretty damn tasty, apparently. Its lethal, vomit-inducing powers were described at length throughout the series, but never once any ingredients. So, we are all left to imagine just what it is Miss Patty put in it. My money is really on moonshine and cherry Kool-aid, but that combo is too close to Jungle Juice for my comfort. Since this isn't actually the blog of a college freshman, I decided to go with a more adult punch blend of fruit juice, vodka, and brandy.

This is a pretty bold mix of juices, with cranberry and pineapple, plus a bit of tropical flavor that I think Miss Patty would approve of. The last addition of sparkling apple cider seems very Stars Hollow appropriate to me, perfect for the Firelight Festival, the Harvest Festival, or any Festival dreamed up by Taylor Doosey. It's certainly a strong mix, but don't worry, it shouldn't be enough to get you dancing on any tables at the Salute to the Quakers Festival or wandering barefoot through the streets searching for a payphone. 

Although, keep in mind, the recipe is supposed to serve 16, so if you decide to drink like a Gilmore as well as eat like one, you may need a taco or two in the morning.

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Founders Punch

Basically, this is a lot of juice and a little less booze. Adapted from Eat Like a Gilmore. The original recipe calls for three cups of passionfruit juice, which sounds like Miss Patty, but I'm sorry, still seemed insane to me because 1) where do I buy that? and 2) given the price of whole passionfruit, how much does that even cost? I've substituted with a juice blend containing a bit of passion fruit juice, but I think any "tropical" flavor blend would work well.

• 2 cups pineapple juice
• 1 1/2 cup cranberry juice
• 2 cups "tropical" juice blend (I used Odwalla's Citrus C Monster)
• 1 cup vodka
• 1/2 cup brandy
• 1 cup sparkling apple cider
• ice, for serving

1. Combine all except apple cider in a large pitcher or bowl. Stir well to combine and chill until ready to serve. 
2. When ready to serve, pour over ice and top with a splash of apple cider.

Mucho Mac & Cheese

Today we've got a dish on the Gilmore feast menu in honor of the best character, in my opinion, ever to meet the Gilmore Girls, one Paris Gellar. She's bossy, driven, smart, and hilarious, and she always knows just the right thing to say when you need to hear it most:

She also has a weakness for mac and cheese.

Much like Paris Gellar, I too get excited when staring down containers of creamy, cheesy macaroni. Unlike Paris Gellar, Jess Mariano did not deliver this to my friend's house while we were studying. But then, I also didn't need to call my Portugese nanny for permission to eat it, so I guess I win? 

It was really hard to decide what kind of mac and cheese to make for this! There are tons of recipes and methods out there, all delicious, and it really came down to the kind of mac and cheese I think Luke would probably serve in his diner. It had to be simple to make, but gooey and cheesy, and be traditional, but maybe have a little something special about it too. And so, when I found a recipe that called for mixing together a pound of cheese, milk, and uncooked noodles and then baking to yield a super creamy, cheesy, and decadent casserole, I knew I'd found the answer. Because why would Luke want to spend time parboiling his pasta when he could just cook it all together in the oven?  And the addition of cottage cheese in this recipe felt very Luke to me. He's always begging Lorelai and Rory to eat better, so why wouldn't he slip them a little cottage cheese on the sly, especially if it made for really great mac and cheese?

And, just in case you forgot about another infamous mac and cheese dish from the show, I've also included instructions for how you can turn this into Sookie's Jalapeno Chipotle Mac and Cheese. There won't be a cream sauce but it's still not likely to be enjoyed by children.

(If the noodles look a little toasted in these photos, well, apparently my oven heard my frequent complaints that it doesn't go above 400 degrees and decided to prove me wrong, with real enthusiasm!)

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Easy, Creamy Mac & Cheese

Adapted from Julia Moskin. I changed up the cheese a bit and added some dijon mustard and breadcrumbs, for that little something extra.

• 1 tbs butter, plus more for greasing pan
• 1 cup cottage cheese (not no fat)
• 2 cups milk
• 1 tsp dry mustard powder
• 1 tsp dijon mustard
• pinch of cayenne pepper
• pinch of nutmeg
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1/4 tsp fresh ground black pepper
• 1/2 lb sharp cheddar cheese, shredded
• 1/2 lb mild cheddar cheese, shredded
• 1/2 lb elbow macaroni, uncooked
• 1/2 cup breadcrumbs

1. Heat oven to 375 degrees. Butter a 9 inch baking dish or 2 loaf pans. Combine cheddar cheeses together in a large bowl. Reserve 1/4 cup of the cheese and set aside.
2. In a blender, puree the cottage cheese, milk, mustard powder, dijon mustard, and spices until smooth. Add to the bowl of cheddar cheese, add the uncooked pasta, and stir to combine.
3. Pour pasta mixture into baking pan and bake for 30 minutes, covered with foil. 
4. Uncover the pan, stir the mixture around a bit, then sprinkle with remaining cheese. Melt the tablespoon of butter and stir into the breadcrumbs, then sprinkle mixture on top of macaroni. Bake, uncovered, for 30 minutes more, until browned and bubbly. Let cool for 15 minutes before serving.

Notes:

• For Sookie's spicy variation: sub half the shredded cheese for jack cheese. With the cottage cheese mixture, blend in 1 chipotle in adobo plus 1-2 tsps of the adobo sauce. Thinly slice 1/2 jalapeno, then dice up the remaining half. Add the diced jalapeno to the pasta mixture and bake according to directions above, then, when topping with cheese and breadcrumbs, add sliced jalapeno. I can't promise this will look as green as Sookie's mac and cheese, but it will definitely be spicy.